been a sucker for Y! horoscopes lately. just the idea of living the day, and finding -by the end of da day- that someone outthere had been 'predicting' how ur day wud've went.. kinda annoying. dont u think? then i tried to read the 'prediction' just as the day about to starts. sometimes it has some good calming pointers on how to see things in its more optimistic values. so i cud live with that. out of the past week.. think they've got only 2 days of wrong predictions. dats good rite? well this morning i wake up to this:

Today will not be like most other days, dear Cancer. Look around you and you will see that people either have their heads in the clouds, are depressed, or seem to be trying to keep up a good facade. The planetary atmosphere is such that a lot of people - and you in particular - feel frustrated by an inability to realize their dreams. This is a difficult situation to be in, to be sure. Know that it will pass.

heumn, not a very good menu at all. not after i fixed my bed, opened all my windows to a bright sunny day, did my laundry -my last woolen batch (hooray!) and having my 3 days old veg's and fish porridge. heumn, it started as soup then transformed into chinese' style runny porridge and today is indon' style thick porridge. still taste good, just sick of having the same menu different forms in da past 3 days -and ah ya, i dont do 'heavy' bfast.

my second day, bound not to speak to him. it feels... ok. a lot of self-restraining, but hey.. il live. think its going to be more heart breaking if he suddenly appeared on my door step. i dont think id know what to do. err... il take him out for coffee/dinner, try to have a decent one on one conversation, as an adult.. and if he still seem to lost for words: then its a reality il find hard to live on for now. thus everything else other than wud be fine. even my 9.30 appointment this morning...

i tend to push people away

in my outmost vulnerable state of mind