the last balloon to flew

spent the day in an amusement park. tried to constantly be amuse. but i am just myself. the easy but hard guarded git (idiot), among new crowd that is not my hood. and what hood do i have left but a stiffened collar? o yeh, it was fun nonetheless. i laughed, i screamt, i teared. twas nice. mr helium balloon seller left me with that last impression of the park. drawn by the 80's much inspired metallic/neon bright colors.. before my mind starts to tickles:

"look look, (so much balloon) he is not flying!!"

spent the evening with my outmost trusted man on the island. if i have to stop by an intersection, blocking a third of the road entrance into a main road, so i can wait for him -is done. that man. high visibility: five meters away right across from where my car is causing congestion. and he just being himself. he stop to exchange salam w my previous friend passenger. in that very moment as if i am not even there waiting, like the congestion is normal, yet the very cue of such commotion off edgware road that evening was: me. somehow this... hm, made it all 'ok'. i trust that he wudnt put his own ego above everyone else.. let alone when it involves safety. i, trust him

am: hey, hv u met nabile before?
ps: no.


then am off to see Pit: Bu Athan, pas mgu lalu papasan di KBRI insist ngasih obat jerawat which i gotta pick up fr him. turned to be a VERY awkward dinner.. Pit is start taking his distance without being cold -thus the comfort between us, made the whole thing a circus of irony. soon aft i dropped him off, gue mendadak kalap sendiri in my own feelings. otw home gue tlp hamzah, told him abt my meeting and how it feels like my first goodbye dinner.. of course hamzah so sweetly says he'd help to make my transition to paris a smooth one.

heh. gue baru sadar gimana.. my friendship w pit NOW, is based on the accumulative rides of merry-go-round ironic circus, once labeled "love". something that he and i become accustomed to. *smirk. so which one was it girls?
A) did i lost my self-respect in my "love" for pit.. or
B) was it pure faith?
huhuhuhuhu... naaahh, dont bother answering. am gonna tenyum tenyum sendiri to bed wondering aimlessly if love perhaps a circus afterall .................................................:))