whatever i felt and thought of tonight
accumulated into a strange energy than expected
when i was expecting nothing

and my body is not at its peak,
first day ot my first period cycle of a new javanese year
can one body be so vulnerable next to spiritual timing?

i was only minding my own new discovery about
me growing up
or is there a new childhood acknowledgement too soon to be realized?

it really felt like the same rush of being chased in a bad dream, when i was still awake.


where is my angelic voice de Iwan to calm me to sleep?